So, I said in my first post that my rheumatoid arthritis was essentially in remission. Well, at least I was before I stopped the Arava. It's days like today that make me wonder if it's slipping away. How would this feel if I were pregnant and on fewer meds (or no meds at all)? How I would handle a baby on a day like today?
It started off OK. Got up at 6:30, hobbled out of bed a bit, but that's just par for the course (I already have erosions in my feet). I didn't feel too stiff. Headed out for a walk. It was cold. Ankles were a little stiff, but not too bad.
Back home, ready for work. Pulling on my clothes and notice my fingers are a little achy. It's hard to open things now. Shoot up with some Enbrel, swallow a handful of pills (fish oil, folic acid, Plaquenil, Zoloft). Hopefully those will kick in.
Make it to my desk and the wrists start in. Take 400mg of ibuprofen - some days it feels like I pop pills like candy. Get up after sitting for an hour and my knee screams at me as I get it going. After about a minute of walking, it lets up.
So as I type this, my wrists are hurting. I can feel the swelling in my knuckles. And I wonder - how would it feel to have to hold a child right now? I held my 3 month old nephew on Friday - when I was feeling pretty good - and had to give up after about 20-30 minutes. 16 pounds weighs quickly on this weakened joints, it seems.
It's days like these I throw a little pity party and long for my youth. I'm only 29! I shouldn't have to deal with this. But so it goes. And so I go. Just a little more slowly.